Fabulous February

Fabulous February


Ahhh, February. You roll around once a year, deceptively short, but we know the truth: This is the heart of winter and you’re going to feel looong.

I live in Florida these days and for us it really is the start of spring, but I’ve spent most of my life in chilly countries and I KNOW the toll it can take - that constant icy slap of cold whenever you leave shelter like some snooty 18th century aristocrat is whipping a glove across your face and demanding satisfaction. Takes your very breath away. like A dementor’s kiss, it is soul sucking and spirit-depleting.

This is the time of year when SAD syndrome takes its toll, when bills from Christmas are still piled high, and when people start hating on themselves for not following through on January promises to themselves.

So of course, it’s the “perfect” time for Valentine’s Day [marketingdouchsayswhat?]

Now I’m happily married but it wasn’t always so. I decided during the long, lonely years i spent in a bad relationship, and the years that followed being single (a regular odyssey to be sure) that february should be a month of doing stuff that I wanted to do, stuff that had nothing to do with being a couple. So in that grand tradition:

Here’s my Personal to do list for Feeling Fabulous and not Feckless in February 2019:

1.Use more alliterations.

2. Put things on the list that I’ve already done so I can check them off and feel all productive.

2.Host fancy teas, even if i’m the only one who shows up.

3. Write bad poetry. (“My angry va-jay-jay yearns, yearns, yearns…calling out into the void that echos, echos, echos…”) ha, ha, Just kidding. Mine is a pretty happy-go-lucky sort. Wants to join a walking group and debate the merits of yoga.

4. Bake macarons. They make me feel faaaancy. And maybe I can get some funny fail pics out of it.

5.Day drink at least once. (It’s mih-mowwwsah, not: Mimo-sah!)

Time to snorkel!

Time to snorkel!

6.Go running more. It’s much easier to motivate myself now that there’s a toddler at home clinging to me like saran wrap on Sara-Lee cake at a summer picnic (alliteration, hello!). Five years ago it was like: UGH, I don’t wanna!! Now? WHOOPEE! Freedom!! Buh-bye ya little fungus!

7. Pay LESS attention to my daughter. Less attention to her tantrums, her messes and her mistakes. (Made you look).

8. Part I: Watch Halle Berry’s Catwoman on repeat until I’m fabulous by osmosis. (zip-it, it was a great movie, lee-me-alone, you wanna fight about it?) Part II: Think about how I can emulate Halle after her transformation.

9. Finally go on a scavenger hunt to Find all the household stuff that’s gone missing over the years, Like the cat ears I wore at Halloween and felt choker.

10. I’m not going to say number 8 has anything to do with number 9 or if it’s what you’re thinking, but it does and it is.

So there you go. A bunch of things on a list, because that’s what we do in February. Now go forth and multiply items of your own, and remember: Make them achievable you mad, magical and magnificent mutha’.



Found ‘em!

James Bond Photoshoot

James Bond Photoshoot

Hamburglar Photoshoot

Hamburglar Photoshoot